Natalie's Books of 2015

Hello, friends! (I write this as though so many people read this, when in reality it's just me and maybe my mom. Hi, Mom.) Once again, I have proved a most inconsistent blogger, but I thought that, as the end of the year is quickly approaching, it might be fun to review some of the books I've read this year. Also, I didn't want to do school work.

Without further ado--

Everything* I've Read in 2015

*Everything except the books I forgot**
**Side note, all titles in italics are books I reread***
 ***I reread a lot of books

1. The Golem and the Jinni by Helene Wecker
2. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
3. Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte
4. Hard Times by Charles Dickens
5. Isla and the Happily Ever After by Stephanie Perkins
6. Middlemarch by George Eliot
7. To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf
8. Edenbrooke by Julianne Donaldson*
9. The Story of England by Christopher Hibbert
10. We Should Hang Out Sometime: Embarrassingly, a True Story by Josh Sundquist
11-14. The Song of the Lioness series by Tamora Pierce
15. Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine
16. Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman
17. The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern
18. American Gods by Neil Gaiman
19. The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight by Jennifer E. Smith
20-22. The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater
23. The Scarlet Pimpernel by Baroness D'Orczy
24. The Scorpio Races by Maggie Stiefvater
25. Shadow Scale by Rachel Hartman
26. The Ranger's Apprentice by John Flanagan
27. Spindle's End by Robin McKinley
28. Summers at the Castle Auburn by Sharon Shinn
29.  Lament by Maggie Stiefvater
30. Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard: The Sword of Summer**
31. Winter by Marissa Meyer
32. East by Edith Pattou
33. The Horse and His Boy by C.S. Lewis
34. The Princess of the Silver Woods by Jessica Day George
35. The Mill on the Floss by George Eliot

*To be honest, I read that book multiple times this year.
**Actually haven't finished that one. Oops.

Notable Mentions:

1. Everything Maggie Stiefvater

I have a super serious obsession with her books. They read like something out of my dreams, or my very heart. Stiefvater has a miraculous way with words that creates the most magical stories. I've been reading her books for several years now (since I was, like, thirteen) but this summer I rekindled my love when I read her newest series, The Raven Cycle. These books are so, so good. Every character is so precious and the world is so mythic and fantastic. I also read The Scorpio Raves (technically a reread, but I remembered nothing of the plot so it was like reading it afresh) and Lament. Of these two, I preferred The Scorpio Races, but I enjoyed both thoroughly. Basically Maggie Stiefvater is queen and I want to be her when I grow up.

2. Fairy-tale Retellings

This year I also indulged my love of fairy tales. I love books that draw from myths and fairy tales, and I read some really good retellings in the past months. East retold the fairy tale "East o' the Sun, West o' the Moon," aka the polar bear king story. This fairy tale is so under-appreciated, but is one of my most favorites. I loved Pattou's take on the story and felt so happy and satisfied by the end. Winter also made me happy in so many ways. As the conclusion to Meyer's sci-fi fairy-tale series, Winter combined the stories of Cinderella, Little Red Riding Hood, Rapunzel, and Snow White. Meyer does characters so well and I really enjoyed seeing the series wrap up.

3. Neverwhere, a London Adventure

Like with The Scorpio Races, I have actually read Neverwhere before, but it had been several years and I had forgotten many of the details. So, while on my study abroad, I decided to listen to the BBC radio dramatization of the novel. Let me tell you, that was on of the best decisions of my life. I listened to it whilst in London, and it was just the neatest thing to visit the places mentioned in the novel. I remember, one day when I had visited the British Museum, I came back to the youth hostel to relax and listen to Neverwhere. As I listened to it, the characters actually went to the British Museum--the museum I had just been in, like, an hour ago. Listening to the book was such a fun experience and really made me cherish my time in London even more. Also, listening to James McAvoy and Benedict Cumberbatch narrate is always a plus.

There you have it! All the books I read this year (probably). Hopefully, once finals are over, I can squeeze in a few more before the new year comes around. But I look forward to all the lovely books next year will bring.

Until the next time I need to procrastinate,
Natalie

in which i go "to england where my heart lies"

Those who know me well are aware that I recently spent the last seven weeks traveling throughout Great Britain on study abroad. I don't think there are words to convey how wonderful and important this trip was, and is, to me. 

Before I can begin describing it, you readers must know something about me: I love England. You may think to yourself, Oh, I love England, too. Harry Potter was brilliant. And not to say that your love of England is any less valid than mine, but you must understand--I LOVE ENGLAND. It has been for many years my second home, in a way; a world I would visit in books and in my heart. I had made a home for myself in books, and it was in my book-England that I felt the most at home. I loved all the countries of Great Britain: Scotland, England, and Wales. They felt like intimate friends, even though I hadn't really been to them before. While I was applying to Brigham Young University, I also looked at study abroad programs. I had always known I wanted to study abroad, ever since my eldest sister went on her study across Europe. As I searched through the programs, I found one--British Literature and Landscape. A program in which students would hike across the British countryside, visiting literary sites, reading the best literature of the land, and writing essays on their experiences. It was as if someone had created it just for me.

I knew, I knew, right then that I needed to go on this trip.

Two years later, I am walking out of a plane and into the Edinburgh airport and its real. I'm here, I thought, it's real. Even though everything felt like a dream.

Writing this, I don't even know where to begin. How do I summarize such an experience? But I suppose I must try.

{ARTHUR'S SEAT, EDINBURGH}

This trip was hard, taxing and challenging me beyond anything I had faced before. Before leaving, I realized that I would be hiking a lot during the course of those seven weeks, but I, for some reason, never really thought it would be difficult. (what were you thinking, natalie???) In my mind, we would just walk for miles and miles and, to quote Elizabeth Bennet, "I am very fond of walking."

You can imagine my surprise, then, when I found myself at the foot of a mountain in Scotland. 

{ON TOP OF BEN LOMAND}

{ben means mountain in scottish gaelic btw}

Another thing you must understand about me: I balk in the face of difficulty. I don't like to push or challenge myself, preferring much to stay at home in a comfortable chair with a plate of cookies nearby. I'm a lot like Bilbo Baggins at the beginning of The Hobbit, really. I hated climbing the three mountains--Ben Lomand, Sty Head Pass, and Helvellyn (which were somehow all in the the first week of the trip). My legs ached and my breaths wheezed and my mind shouted, "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?!" As we went up Ben Lomand, I couldn't feel my body for all the cold. Through Sty Head Pass, the rains and winds battled us so fiercely I could hardly help staggering about and was soaked to the bone by the time we finished. On our way up Helvellyn, we climbed up a way so steep I considered just sitting down on the mountain to die amongst the wildflowers and sheep poop. 

I loved it so much. 

During these hikes, I complained and screamed inside my head, but when you reach the top and you see the country expand around you--you forget about the cramps in your legs and the shortness of your breath. The world becomes a sea of mountains around you, sometimes misty and magical, sometimes bright and bold. I had never summited a mountain before this trip, and when I reached the top of Ben Lomand (which is the first mountain we climbed) I couldn't help feeling proud of myself. There is something so satisfying in the knowledge that you faced and conquered the hard thing that was before you. Like I said, I'm not one to leave my comfort zone; the world outside seems much too hard and frightening. But hiking those mountains made me think that perhaps I'm better able to meet those hard, frightening things. Or maybe I'm just really good at lying to myself. 

I enjoyed each and every one of the hikes we did during those weeks. Britain is so beautiful and I came to feel so at home walking amongst the long fields of grass and wildflowers. After the great rains of Sty Head Pass, the weather became quite fair for the remainder of our trip. Whenever I think of England now, all I see are blue skies and green fields (the deepest, brightest green you can imagine) and yellow flowers that push through the ground wherever they can. (I wish I were there now.) Perhaps one of the more memorable hikes was the day we walked from Earby to Haworth. We had already walked fourteen miles the day before along the Pennine Way, which we were to continue on for another fifteen miles, partly through the famous moors of the Bronte sisters. I was really exited to see the moors, less exited to hike another long, fifteen miles. The day was warmer than previous days and I found myself drinking more water than usual. By noon, most of my water was gone and we hadn't gone half the distance we needed to for all our turning around and getting lost. By the time we reached the moors, I felt quite weak from dehydration. Also, I had a cold.

{THE MOORLAND}

To better communicate my dramatic experience on the moors, here is an excerpt from my travel journal. I can't really say it better than I did then:

Walking along the moors was a most bizarre experience. Before we began the hike, some other [students] told stories of previous groups of this study abroad and how they went crazy. The idea seemed wildly Romantic to me, going crazy on the moors. I could not wait to feast my eyes on the rugged landscape that influenced one of my favorite novels. I felt crazy the moment we stepped into the moorland. The flat, barren expanse goes on forever, only the purplish-brown heather giving it any sort of life or color; it was easy to see why people went mad here. Or perhaps it was just the dehydration addling my brain. The only word to describe my movement is dragged: I dragged my body along with all the meager strength within me. I felt dizzy and footsore and altogether drained. Did the moors do that to me?

I am nothing if not dramatic.

It's funny, though. I went into that hike wanting to feel like Jane Eyre, not realizing that I would feel more like her than I wanted.

The whole trip was filled with moments like this--moments that let me experience my favorite books and authors in tangible, intimate ways. In the Lake District, I saw the lands that inspired Wordsworth to compose his poems; I wandered lonely as a cloud through the gardens around Dove Cottage that he kept wild and untamed. In Wales--rugged, beautiful Wales--I felt so giddy with joy because one of my ALL-TIME favorite authors, Diana Wynne Jones, was half-Welsh and in Howl's Moving Castle, my favorite of her novels, the eponymous Howl is Welsh. It was like sharing a secret joke with myself that only I could understand. To be there, to see those lands, tore the veil between me and my book-England. It wasn't just words on a page anymore; the story was right in front of my eyes.

I had countless moments like this: at the Elephant House, at Chatsworth, at Jane Austen's Home, the Bronte Parsonage, in Oxford ... everyday, really, brought something new and dear to my heart because of the books and country that I loved.

{THE ELEPHANT HOUSE AKA THE BIRTHPLACE OF HARRY POTTER}

{the bathroom walls were covered with homages to the books}

{ANNALEE AND I AT JANE AUSTEN'S HOUSE}

{basically we could be in the next bbc mini series} 

{AT THE EAGLE AND CHILD}

{which is where the inklings aka j.r.r tolkien and c.s. lewis et al would meet and discuss cool stuff} 

I struggle to write this summary because there is so much to say and I just don't know how to properly communicate each precious moment. Even if I did, I don't know that I would want to; some experiences are too dear to share. But I will share this: we were at Tintern Abbey, a ruined edifice near the Welsh / English border. The abbey has been the subject of many literary pieces, not least of all Wordsworth's "Lines," which I adore. Here is my journal entry from that day:

I am in Tintern Abbey and I am writing. The sun feels like a sweet kiss on my skin, warming me despite the breeze. The grass within the ruins lays as a soft blanket with daisies peppering its face. Its one of those rare, perfect days, when the heat and the cold settle their battle and combine beautifully. When I look at the divided sky above me, all I see is blue. 

I have never seen the abbey before, but I can understand why Wordsworth felt so strongly about it. Everything feels so quiet here. No--there is sound. From my seat against this pillar, I hear a tour guide describing the abbey to a large group of tourists. And the birds sing. They know how lovely a day it is. I love this old thing. I love the way the skeleton of it cuts through the sky, forming odd shapes and lines. I love the fact that people still care so much for it, this shell of a once glorious building. It's still glorious, in its shadow and memory and in the joy we still find from it. Tintern is a sacred, special place. 

I hope I never forget how I felt in that moment: peaceful and content beyond belief. How for class that day, my professor read us Wordsworth's poem as we laid amongst the grass and daisies, closing our eyes and listening quietly.

We stayed in London town for ten days near the end of the seven weeks. I loved London. How could I not? I loved the ease with which I could navigate myself through the city. I loved its vast history. I loved its grand parks that were quiet and still despite the millions of people nearby. I loved seeing a play every night (I literally saw a play or musical each night; Peter Pan in the park was my favorite). I loved le pain au chocolat from Pret-a-Manger. But my heart belongs in the country. It belongs with the cottages and the peace and the wildflowers. It belongs with the green hills that go on for miles. The countryside always surprises me with its newness and diversity. I cannot get enough of it. 

With all my excitement for this trip, before I left, I felt such an exceeding anxiety. I was going to be living and traveling with the same group of thirty people for seven weeks and, in my mind, there was a 99.98% chance that not one of them would like me (because that is how my mind works). But this trip and the people surprised me. Each one's kindness, hilarity, and sincere goodness made me feel so at home, despite having been practically strangers. I grew to love all of my classmates (classmates isn't the right word; we went through too much together to be anything less than family) so much it astounded me. Some of the best moments of the trip were the times when we were all together: on hikes, cooking and eating dinners, sneaking extra Digestives late a night, playing Werewolf ... I treasure each of these experiences. The friends I made on this trip healed my heart and helped my soul in ways I cannot describe. (If any of you guys are reading this, thanks for that.)

{SILLY FACES IN HYDE PARK}

 {THE WHOLE DANG BUNCH // LONDON TEMPLE GROUNDS}

This small post does not begin to tell about my study abroad. I don't think I ever could properly. It is too much, too precious. But I wanted to share something because this trip changed me. I look at the world, at people, differently now; I look at myself differently now because I am different. And I think it is for the better. I am so, so grateful that I could go on this study abroad. With out a doubt, those seven weeks were the best of my life. I miss Britain so much my heart aches to think about it. 

I'll go back one day. I know it.

in which i think this post is about me

it's been a while since i've posted to my blog (like, a long while), so i thought i'd write a few things about myself to help the few readers of this thing get to know me better. either that, or i'm feeling particularly vain at the moment. i'll let you decide.

without further ado:

19 THINGS ABOUT NATALIE 

1. i really love pickles. if you gave me a jar of fresh, kosher dills, they'd be gone in a minute. no lie. 

2.  trivia games are my favorite. my dream is to one day be on jeopardy (except not, because then i would be so nervous)

3. when i first met my best friend, elizabeth, i thought she knew sign language because she made all these hand gestures while i would sing or whatever. turns out she's just really good at interpretive hand dancing. 

4. i used to hide in my dad's closet in hopes of finding another world in there (and this before i ever read narnia!)

5. my left elbow bends slightly inward.

6. socks are my favorite item of clothing. i have to restrain myself from buying several pairs anytime i enter a store, even though i have, like, a billion.

7.  i feel a physical pain and sorrow after finishing an especially good book. it takes me a few days to return to normal afterward.

8. i could eat chocolate chip cookies all day, er'ry day.

9. once i swam with a dolphin. (it was ok.)

10. i always cry when i listen to kenny loggins' "your heart will lead you home"

11. as an english major, people often ask, "what's your favorite book?" and i can never answer. i could no sooner pick a limb not to lose, to paraphrase the great Neil Gaiman. 

12. whenever i bake, i always sniff the vanilla. it's one of my favorite scents. 

13.  sometimes i think it'd be really cool to be a horse so i could gallop across the countryside.

14. i wish words like "balderdash" and "codswallop" and "shenanigans" were in more common use nowadays. 

15. when i have a significant other, i will call him "mon petit chou" because in french it means "my little cabbage" and i think that's beautiful

16. i want my life to be like you've got mail. 

17. i like to think my ultimate aim with fashion is to become an ethereal elf lady. 

18. i can't touch my toes. 

19. i am nineteen years old.
 

in which natale fangirls

And the thrilling saga continues!

2. A BOOK YOU’VE READ MORE THAN 3 TIMES

If I am to be perfectly honest, I have read a numberless amount of books more than three times. Having said that, I think the book I have read the most in my life is Howl’s Moving Castle by the impeccable Diana Wynne Jones.

 

I LOVE THIS BOOK.

I do not know how to articulate what I love so well about it. First of all, Diana (I call her Diana because I like to pretend we are best friends) perfectly satirizes the fantasy genre, while still crafting a story that fulfills all one’s fantasy needs. We have Sophie, the mousy eldest daughter so unaware of her own ability that she does not even realize when she enchants things; Howl, the slithery scoundrel of a wizard who’s too busy with his hair to see what a good person he is; and a myriad cast of other characters that are just as zany and magical and unexpected. Basically, Diana takes all the best troupes of fantasy fiction and blends them into a hilarious mess of an adventure.

But wait! Despite being in a land of magic, Diana creates characters that are still quite real and relatable. Sophie, for example, is an inspiration to me. At the beginning of the story, Sophie hides within her family’s hat shop, letting her sisters and (not so wicked) stepmother go and experience life outside their little town. She doubts her abilities so much that she convinces herself she is better off cursed as an old woman. Though being turned into an old woman is not exactly ideal, the curse ultimately frees Sophie and proves that the most powerful curses are the ones we put on ourselves. Howl, too, (despite all his Byronic, drama queen-ness) can be so very human and it is just absolutely wonderful.

AND THE HUMOR. Oh, how I laugh when I read this book! The comedy, I will say, is very British and will not be everyone’s cup of tea (get it? tea? cuz, you know, the Brits drink lots of tea … anyway) but, as a self-professed Anglophile, I grin and cackle constantly throughout. (The banter between Sophie and Howl and Calcifer gives me life.) Diana’s so darn clever and always seems to know exactly what to write. Plus, anyone who can make drunken candor comical is okay in my book.

I really, really, really love this book.

I don't even know how many times I've read it.

"I assure you, my friends, I am cone sold stober."

in which i talk about books

One important thing to know about me: I adore books.

In the words of William Herondale, I "live and breathe words," which is why I've chosen to study English at university. And since I can't be tempted to update this blog with normal things, I thought I'd use this nifty thirty-day reading challenge as a way to get into the habit of posting again. (They say it takes at least twenty-one days to form a habit, right?)

 

 

1: THE BEST BOOK YOU READ THIS YEAR

 

I've read quite a few books this year (especially since returning home for the summer), but the best book, BY FAR, is this little gem.

 

My sister, the librarian, recommended it to me and it did not disappoint. The story takes place during World War II and charts the friendship of two young girls, a pilot and a wireless operator, in the midst of the era's turmoil.

 

But it's so, so much more than that.

 

The novel begins with the reader witnessing the incarceration of the wireless operator, the eponymous "Verity," into Nazi control. The girl, who identifies herself as Queenie, relates the story of her experiences and friendship with ace mechanic / pilot Maddie Broddatt. Her words come at a cost though; with her prolonged life, Queenie must also betray herself, and her cause, to the enemy. (I'm going to stop here, as I really don't want to spoil anything. JUST READ THE BOOK OKAY.)

 

I won't lie to you: the book killed me. By the end, I was sobbing unabashedly (which I am sure looked most amusing in the middle of an airplane) and I felt so betrayed with the conclusion. But this book isn't supposed to be fair, it isn't supposed to be kind. It's supposed to matter. By the end, I felt like I was better for knowing Maddie and Queenie.

 

(And let me say, QUEENIE IS AMAZING. One of the most wonderful and engaging characters I've met in a long time. Despite her terrible situation, she had me cracking up from her sharp wit and Scottish pride.)

 

My little summary really is terrible compared to the wondrous complexity and beauty of the book, but take my word for it: Code Name Verity is worth it. It will make you question the nature of truth, life, and other grand ideas. It will change you.

 

Why are you still here? Go read the dang book!



sunday dreamin'

this weekend commenced one of my favorite times of the year: general conference. as a member of the church of jesus christ of latter-day saints, i revel in the opportunity to hear my beloved prophets speak. it also doesn't hurt that i get to stay in my pajamas all weekend.

 

i adored all of the speakers. i love the kind, sweet spirit of their messages. i love that i know the words they say come from my Heavenly Father. i love being a part of this flawed and human, yet true, church.

 

{also, i especially adored brother uchtdorf's talk. that man always says the best things and i needed to hear them.} 

 

in other news, it's already almost finals week (again) and i am so, so ecstatic to go home to sunshine and summer. my heart is only surviving at the thought of shorts and reading lists and lovin' family time. it's gonna be grand .

 

until then i'll be sitting here, dreaming away of worlds without finals and essays and of good things ahead. 

 

til next time.

 

music loves of late:

the head and the heart {another story & sounds like hallelujah}

simon & garfunkel

queen {don't stop me now--my mantra for the end of the semester}

 

 

 

 

in which it snows

 

it's everywhere and it's driving this florida girl to her warm blankets and sweaters. i did manage to enjoy for a few seconds to have a snowball fight with my roommates and make snow angels. snow has it's purposes, i suppose. (namely to be admired through a thick window sitting by a fire.)

 

also: i will post about thanksgiving soon. just not today.

 

as an update, finals are descending upon all college students and the stress is thick in the air. somehow i still manage to find time to reread the night circus (a lovely book. i highly recommend it) and waste time on pinterest.

 

i cannot wait to return home to the warmth and sun.

 

for your musical enlightenment: sufjan stevens (what that man can do with a banjo)

 

"these are a few of my favorite things"

1. these guys.

2. these songs

{their album just sounds like winter.}

3. these chocolates

4. these faces

5. this place

 



in which birthday shenanigans occur

She would not have me talking about her, but tomorrow is my sister's, Lauren's, birthday. Her ***********, to be exact.

(See, I am not so cruel as to post her age on here, which ISN'T EVEN OLD.)

Anyway, my sister forever holds a dear place in my heart. She is the most wonderfully clever, hilarious, and enlightening sibling one could ask for. I am so grateful for the love, kindness, and advice she's given me over the years. And also for the fact that she understands all my movie references. Lauren's as lovely as people get. (That's not even mentioning her mesmerizing beauty.)

 

{what darlin's we are}

 

 

Thank you, sister dear, for being awesome and taking care of me as I've ventured into college life. I hope the day is bright, shining, and lucky and that all your birthday dreams come true! I love you to infinity and beyond. 



 

in which some things are explained

As I contemplated what to write for today's post, I stared at my blog title and realized: that's a really weird name.

Well, it's not the weirdest, but it does come off as rather narcissistic just glancing at it.

I got the idea of the name because 1. I love stories, 2. I wear glasses (usually only at night when no one else can see me), and 3. I adore foxes.

Seriously, have you ever seen a picture of one? Here I will help you:

JUST LOOK AT THEIR WITTLE FACES AND EARS AND CUTENESS.

My mother also fondly refers to me as a fox, but the name stems more from those little fellas.

There, you have it. That's why this blog is called Tales of a Four-Eyed Fox.

That is all.

In Which Andrew Bird (Again)

"being alone, it can be quite romantic
like Jacques Cousteau underneath the Atlantic
a fantastic voyage to parts unknown
going to depths where the sun's never shone
and i fascinate myself
                  when i'm alone

so i go a little overboard, but hang on to the hull
while i'm airbrushing fantasy art on a life
that's really kind of dull
oh, i'm in a LULL

i'm all for moderation, but sometimes it seems
moderation itself can be a kind of EXTREME
so i joined the congregation
i joined the softball team
i went in for my confirmation
where incense looks like steam
i start conjugating proverbs
where once there were nouns
this whole rhyme scheme's
starting to get me
                             down

oh, i'm in a lull
i'm in a lull

i'm rambling on rather self-consciously
while i'm stirring these condiments into my tea
and i think i'm so lame, i bet i think this song's about me
don't i, don't i, DON'T I?

i'm in a lull."

In Which I Make A Promise (Of Sort)

I know in my last post I said that I was going to try to write more often, though I could not promise anything. But then I thought to myself, I should promise. (Maybe then I'll have an incentive to write more regularly.)

Here is my proposal: I shall endeavor to write or share something each day. And I mean EACH day. (You know, seven days a week, 4 weeks a month, 12 months a year, etc.) Of course, I'll fail occasionally, but better to try to be consistent than simply think about being so.

So, there. Come here each day if you want to know what I'm doing, or simply want a laugh (or someone to laugh at).

To end this short interlude of a blog, here is a song by Andrew Bird, who might very well be my favorite singer / artist alive. Seriously, no one can convince me that this man is not a genius. I MEAN JUST ADMIRE THE WHISTLING AND THE VIOLIN AND THE SOCKS.

In Which I Apologize For Ignoring This Blog For Five Months

Hi. Wow. Has it really been almost five months since I last posted, since I left for college? I remember when I was younger, a year seemed such a long time. Now I can hardly keep with its pace. These past months were a whirlwind, to be sure. A frightening, exhilarating, glorious whirlwind. I am ashamed at how poorly I've kept this blog, for there are so many stories I want to tell you. But for now, I'll keep it short(ish) and sweet by hitting the highlights. I'll even make it a list. (I do love a good list.)

1.

The summer obviously began my college adventure, and I could not have asked for a better way to commence this new chapter of life. The roommates I had are easily some of the greatest people around. My classes were fantastic. (For the record, I am now a semi-trained Irish dancer, so basically I'm quite cool.) Unfortunately, this little blog cannot hold all the stories and jokes from summer (I'm scotch! ... tape), but suffice it to say that I was very happy and I am very lucky. These paltry words don't really do the time justice, so to make up for it, I'll post some pictures.

                                                               {begin photo montage}

                                                                       {the gang}

 

{the sweethearts threw me an early birthday party. see, I told you they were great.}

 

{end photo montage}

 

Sometimes, I really miss the summer and its people. (Especially when it snows.)

 

2.

 

One of the few upsides to summer term ending was that I got to go home for two weeks. Words cannot convey how dearly I missed my family. And how much I enjoyed not having to do homework each night.

 

Aside from being with my family, another exciting thing occurred: I turned E I G H T E E N (to my chagrin). Though I love birthdays, I loath admitting the fact that I am no longer a child. It was still quite a lovely day, however, and I am glad I spent it with my family. I would not want it any other way.

 

3.

 

Upon returning to college, I was sure fall term could not compare to the magnificence of summer. How could it, when summer was quite near perfection? My doubts were quickly confounded, though. First, I met this girl.

 

{the one on the left, not the right.}

That girl, Elizabeth (who I affectionately refer to as Eliza), is my current roommate. She is one of the weirdest and most unusual individuals I have ever met; so, in other words, we get along splendidly. In the short time we've known each other, she has become a dear and darling friend, which I am grateful for. (I'll stop it with all the mushy stuff now.) In reality, most of the time we do things like this:

 

It's a wonderful, open relationship we have, with a touch of cannibalism.

 

There's not much else to say about school. Classes are hard. Friends are good. Sleep and food are best. (and that's pretty much my life right now in a nutshell.)

 

4.

What more? My baby brudder is turning fifteen (when did we get so old?). Thanksgiving soon. Then my older brother comes home from his two-year mission.

 

Life is terribly hard right now, but it is also wonderful and kind, and I am so thankful for that.

 

p.s. I will do my best to update this more regularly, but no promises.

 





In Which A Child Grows Up

Quite a bit of time has passed in the months since my first entry and there are many things I could tell you: such as the fact that mother's day passed, I graduated from high school, or that my best friend is now a married woman. I may, at some point, return to these topics, but right now a certain subject is weighing heavily upon my heart.

Since the day I learned I was accepted into The University of My Dreams, I have experienced a cycle of emotions; a grieving process, if you will.

Step One: shock (did this really just happen?)

Step Two: denial (the part where I blatantly ignore the fact that my childhood is ending and proceed to savor the sweet taste of innocence while I can).

Step Three: hysteria (what? college? socializing? reality? balderdash!)

Step Four: acceptance.

I am currently on Step Four, which is not so much acceptance but the sharp slap of adulthood on my face.

And I am excited for college: I really am. I am hopeful, which is a beautiful state to be in. However, I am also worried, and as a practiced worrier, I am meticulously filing every single thing that can go wrong for me into my Cabinet of Anxiety: things such as what if nobody likes me? or what if my teachers are mean? or what if my cookies don't turn out well in the high altitude? The important topics.

I was given a gift today from a soul very dear to mine. Once I arrived home, I went straight to my room and opened it. I sobbed. It is such a magnificent gift, so kind and gracious and wonderful. It is everything I love and it was as if a part of my heart had been displayed on each page. As I cherished my gift, I felt such a comfort. I am loved by so many and I feel great gratitude in that. Not everyone is as lucky as I and it feels selfish to waste any of the blessings I am given. I want to experience all the good the world has to offer me. I want to travel and learn and have adventures and meet wonderful people and do glorious things. Though I am very afraid, I hope the love others have for me will help me to be brave.

My father gave me a priesthood blessing tonight. At first I cried and shook underneath his words, but a sweet peace came over me as he continued to speak. How glad I am that he is a worthy man, and how glad I am to have a Heavenly Father who sends such good things to me! Leaving my only home and family will be the hardest challenge but I think I am ready to experience what lies in store. After all, dreams and wishes can only take us so far.

Anyway, it's late and raining and I am most likely making utter nonsense. Also, I have to wake up at six-fifteen a.m., approximately six hours from now, and proceed to drive for thirteen hours. So here is my last farewell: au revior, childhood. It was nice while it lasted.

an introduction

hello.

this is obviously my first post. you don't know me, and quite frankly, i am still getting to know myself as well. this is why i am here.

in less than two months, i will journey to a far-off land called YOU JUST GRADUATED FROM HIGH SCHOOL AND ARE NOW LIVING ALONE AND ATTENDING COLLEGE. and perhaps i am not ready for this to happen. but i thought that if i could write the thoughts and experiences that will occur during this small adventure, i might not be so scared. hence the blog (because if i am to record my embarrassments, it might as well be available for all to see).

are you still here?

good.

a few things you ought to know: i am a girl in her eighteenth year of existence. currently, i am still a high school student but will soon leave for BYU (as stated above) to study english. my goal in life is to write words for a living and create beautiful things in general. i hope to include several book reviews in this blog because books are, like, awesome.

anyway, i hope you enjoy my stories. there are sure to be happy ones and sad ones but i just hope that they will all be an adventure.